How My First Year of College Has Changed My Relationship with Social Media
July 30, 2025 | By Edward
By the end of high school I only really used Instagram–kind of just keeping my profile for the sporadic log-in every couple weeks to make sure I hadn’t missed any messages. It was a conscious effort after trying to step away from social media after a long time of overuse in middle school and the COVID-19 pandemic, trying to push myself away from the constant pull that social media had on me. It wasn’t easy, because it also meant closing myself from the social interactions of the online world, but it was one of the best things I had done for my mental health at the time. It also helped that I became more comfortable being “out of the loop”—in high school, most things happened during the school day anyway, so staying connected online after school didn’t feel as necessary.
As I wrap up my first year of college though, I’ve been surprised how my relationship with social media has changed this year. With all the changes of college, moving to a new town, adapting to a new style of studying, and new friends, I didn’t really think my digital life would change with it all–after all, for years my tech habits were pretty static.
It started with the canon event of every freshman–joining way too many clubs. Each club, though, had different ways to send out messages and updates, and while some relied on email, many used platforms I had never even heard of before. (I never thought my generation really used Facebook, but it’s a real thing!) I now look at my phone, and I have eight different social media platform apps, and a couple more that I only access online.
As someone who struggled with overuse of social media in the past, all the new apps was overwhelming, and my reaction was to try to be intentional with them, silencing notifications, only checking them every couple days when I needed to. But being in college, events and opportunities (and lots of free food!) are usually publicized last-minute–so only the most active members of the clubs who were constantly available on the platforms learned about what was going on. This time-based urgency really was a strong pressure to stay online, and while I’ve missed more than a few events I wish I could’ve gone to, I’ve found this balance of staying away from the bombardment of notifications works to keep me grounded and off of hours of social media.
More than a few people have come up to me and said that I’m hard to reach, or that they hadn’t heard back from me for a while and were worried I was mad at them—usually because I hadn’t logged into the app they messaged me on. Especially on certain platforms like Instagram, the social media etiquette requires you to accept friend requests and follow people back as soon as possible, so when I don’t log into Instagram for a few weeks, someone will inevitably reach out asking why I didn’t accept their request. I now tell everyone who asks for my Instagram account that I likely won’t accept their request until many weeks later, and to not be offended if I don’t get back to them. I’ve definitely felt that part of the “college experience” has become integrated with an expectation to be constantly online. There’s a sort of implied guilt that comes up for not being instantly available, always reachable, and immediately ready to respond. If you’re not, you’re distant or flaky, even if it’s not your intention to ghost people—It’s never personal, but it’s one of those consequences of making that decision about how you’ll interact online.
“There’s a sort of implied guilt that comes up for not being instantly available, always reachable, and immediately ready to respond.”
Still, social media does help in college. Beyond friends I only know online, there’s definitely a different vibe that each platform has, which can affect how much I want to engage in the community that’s built around the club’s social media. What college has shown me this past year, though, is that while college kind of requires you to be online all the time, just to keep up socially or stay involved, that requirement is something that you can choose to follow or not. And while finding that balance takes time, it’s absolutely doable—and it’s been one of the more unexpected lessons of my first year in college.
About the author
Edward (he/him) is a first-year at Harvard College with an interest in the systems that youth interact with, and how it affects their physical and mental health. He's particularly interested in the roles of policy and tech in making change, both socially and in public health. He’s especially interested in the roles that policy and the online-experience play in public health, and how we might take advantage of them to make real system-change. Outside of school and being a #GoodforMEdia Youth Leader, you’ll find Edward going on walks around campus, trying his hand at a new dish, or window shopping at antique stores.
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