Reels vs. Reality: The Dangers of the “Hustler Mentality” and Modern Hypermasculinity
August 29, 2025 | By Grayson
“Hustler mentality,” “escaping the Matrix,” and “alpha grind set”: these terms that would have sounded crazy ten years ago have now become commonplace in the social media world. Through platforms like Instagram, Twitter, and Reddit, influencers have encouraged impressionable young audiences to pursue lifestyles deviating from the “basic” path of school and working a 9-5, whether it be dropping out of school to learn dropshipping or quitting a job to solely pursue crypto. These influencers curate the appearance of an extravagant lifestyle on social media, where they flaunt fancy cars and watches to their viewers. What the audience sees, however, is merely a snapshot: most of these influencers conceal their real lives behind the facade of social media. Often, these influencers have to rent out the private jets and luxury cars they showcase, hoping to convey an impression of glamour. Seeing only wealth and apparent happiness, their audience is deceived into believing that they can achieve similar lifestyles simply by adopting the same mindset as these influencers.
The hidden costs behind this lifestyle
While I’m not here to judge the decision to start a business instead of attending college, I do think that this “hustler” mindset promoted on social media is borderline predatory to teens. I’ve even seen kids younger than me on Instagram falling into this trap, dropping out of school and relying solely on crypto or online businesses, believing they will strike gold like their social media heroes. Little do they know, however, that many—if not the majority—of people who try to “escape the Matrix” are anything but successful and often end up hurting themselves financially. While by no means impossible, the percentages of failure are quite high; around 90% of online businesses fail after about four months (according to the Entrepreneur) and approximately 73% to 81% of retail cryptocurrency investors lose money (as recorded by the Bank for International Settlements). Unfortunately, many aspiring “hustlers” never see these statistics and fall prey to misleading “success” stories they encounter online, unaware of their impending failure until it's too late.
“...social media allows people to select the highlights of their lifestyle: what most people post is far from the full picture.”
Not only does this “hustler” mentality trap impressionable teens into a financially risky lifestyle, but more frighteningly, it promotes materialistic and misogynistic values. One prominent influencer urges men to be dominant physically and mentally over others, particularly women. This influencer even went so far as to call himself “absolutely a misogynist,” claiming that he’s simply “a realist…and when you’re realist, you’re sexist” (as per the BBC). This same Twitter account encourages the suppression of emotions, claiming that “telling men to ‘cry more’ and ‘act how they feel’... is what’s dangerous.” In doing so, he and other similar influencers contribute to the modern deterioration of male mental health as more and more men try to resist vulnerability and emotions. As this brand of toxic masculinity becomes increasingly widespread, it’s all the more important for adolescent boys and young men to understand how social media allows people to select the highlights of their lifestyle: what most people post is far from the full picture.
Finding healthy alternatives on social media
While it may be impossible to eradicate these online personas, I believe that social media does offer plenty of healthy alternatives. For example, almost a year ago, I discovered an Instagram account where a man posts reels in a day-in-the-life style; however, instead of showcasing his fancy cars or millionaire businesses like other influencers do, he goes about a pretty average day, working his 9-to-5 job, taking his dog for walks, and caring for his newborn. Each time his account surfaces on my feed, I am fascinated by the stark contrast that his videos provide compared to most modern influencers. Rather than promoting materialism and misogyny, he showcases a healthier lifestyle, one that centers on his relationships with loved ones and, albeit not as fancy, is full of contentment. I first discovered the account when it was relatively small; today, his brand has reached 1.5 million followers, but nonetheless, his message has remained one of positive masculinity and prosocial, pro-familial values.
What we can do
Unfortunately, social media algorithms will always favor accounts that spark controversy and generate impressions over those that promote stability and healthy values. Since social media platforms are unlikely to change their methods anytime soon, it's up to the audience—us—to make the necessary changes. But, even if we know the danger of these messages, what can we do about it? For one, simply having awareness about a topic like this makes it harder to fall into the hustler mentality trap. Just knowing that what we see on social media is not the full picture can prevent us from idealizing superficial lifestyles that, in reality, are unhealthy and unrealistic. Even more, though, I believe that all of us can promote this awareness to those around us, particularly those who might be in the target audience for these online influencers. For me, that’s my little brother, whose media consumption I’m becoming increasingly aware of as he approaches his teenage years. I want to ensure that the values of materialism and misogyny that many modern influencers promote don’t reach him—or, at the very least, that he has the awareness to think critically about the things he sees online. But it’s not just him; I want everyone to be able to see through the illusions of these influencers and think for themselves. At the end of the day, this ability to think critically helps not just with avoiding the traps of the “hustler mentality,” but social media in general and everyday life as a whole.
About the author
Grayson (he/him) is a rising senior at the Roxbury Latin School in Boston, where he has lived his entire life. Although technically a middle child, with one older and two younger siblings, Grayson has always identified more closely with the “older sibling” role. This led him to develop an interest in tutoring and teaching, which he started pursuing this summer through a program called Generation Teach. He loves track and field, basketball, writing and sketching, as well as watching movies late at night with friends.
Additional Tools and Insights 📚
#GoodforMEdia's Guide to Social Comparison: This guide was created to help young people navigate social comparison, a common phenomenon that can make social media a draining experience. This resource explains why we engage in social comparison and contains detailed strategies for combatting comparison related to appearance, FOMO (fear of missing out), achievement, and social media metrics.
#GoodforMEdia Guides and Tools: Explore a list of resources created by youth to help their peers and adult allies navigate the positive and negative aspects of social media.
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